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Columnist: Obama Will Cancel 2016 Election, Spark Race War

Reverend Austin Miles has penned a new column for Renew America claiming that President Obama will cancel all future elections and start a “national race riot.”

“Here is the intent,” Miles writes. “If Obama’s scheme makes it through, there will be no further Presidential elections. This has been planned for a long, long time. One thing about the Communists, they are very patient as they quietly work toward the completion of a definitive goal ahead.”

Communists? What is this, 1953?

“That goal, of course, is to see America turned into a Marxist Socialist Nation controlled by Communist Czars – and did you notice that the world ‘Czar’ was never used in regards to government officer titles in the United States until Obama was placed on the throne? That term was only used in Communist Russia.”

First of all, every president going back to Truman has “czars,” and Bush had 33.

Second of all, there were no czars in Communist Russia. In fact, the Communist Party began after the Bolsheviks staged a revolution to remove the Czar in 1917. Joseph Stalin, for example, was the Chairman of the Council of Ministers and General Secretary of the Communist Party, not a “czar.”

But, yeah, Miles has this one all figured out, despite having the historical knowledge of a third grader.

Oh, but there’s more.

“Obama was hand-picked and groomed at an early age,” he claims. “Born in Kenya, brought to America and put through the University, he was the ideal front runner for the new America. By him being black, and touted as the first black president, his Communist handlers got it out that this would sooth ‘white guilt. To NOT vote for him would be classified as ‘racism.’”

Okay, so let’s get this straight. The United States is so devoid of these apparently magical black people that can become president, his “Communist handlers” had to go all the way to Kenya to pick out a magical black baby that can become president 46 years later? They couldn’t just call Cory Booker? Okay, makes sense.

“The Communists are scheming for the Ferguson, Missouri incident to be the fuse that explodes into a national race riot,” Miles alleges. “That is what Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton are hoping to accomplish since this would put citizens at war with themselves in a new civil war while as the same time sapping the strength out of America.”

Wait, are we supposed to believe that Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton have any hidden agenda outside of simply trying to locate the nearest camera to feed their insatiable attention addiction? Not likely.

“If all works according to plan, there will be no further presidential elections,” Miles concludes. “Obama will declare a crisis (he can pick from a large number of those) so he can use Executive Privilege to declare himself President for Life, which he fully intends to do.”

Okay, even if that were true instead of laughable and certifiable, then what? Then Obama is just going to spend the rest of his life watching Congress repeal ObamaCare on a weekly basis? A life fit for a king, no doubt.

About the author

Igor Derysh is the Managing Editor of Latest. com and a syndicated columnist whose work has appeared in The Los Angeles Times, Chicago Tribune, Boston Herald, Baltimore Sun, and Orlando Sun Sentinel, and AOL News. His work has been criticized in even more publications. Follow him on Twitter @IgorDerysh

  • Linda Brown

    what’s this guy smoking?

  • Scott Helmus

    wtf where does the rnc find these people….

  • Felton Mitchell

    you freaking people are brain dead

  • Gabby Parsons

    Fortunately the AHCA covers metal health care.

  • msaxie

    Reverend, and I use that term tongue and cheek, I demand solid proof of your claims. If you, acting like a clergyman, want to spout political garbage you need to pay taxes.

  • msaxie

    Wait, this is satire, right?

    • Regina Arrendell

      Unfortunate but try…not satire…just crazyness!

  • Regina Arrendell

    I think he may be smoking and drinking…or he’s only some really serious drugs! He needs to be put in a robber room! There are some crazy people out in the world. He’s about as serious as “reverend” as my puppy is…oh, wait, my puppy might be a better one!

  • Michelle McBee Johnson

    K. Here we go again, wandering around in Crazyville……

  • Joie Travis Durham

    What, is this a creative writing contest?